spencer

@TheSpencerRyan exudes confidence,
I mean, have you seen him???
His dark good looks and tattooed muscled perfection are too much.
He’s hot. Lickably hot.
And he has a way with words that leaves me breathless.
But cocky doesn’t even cover it,
this guy is so arrogant you have to fight back.
But God he’s so lickable!
The thing is though,
he looks like sex but he’ll taste like jackass.

@OMGJazzyP is a sexy, annoying ball of rage in fuck-me heels
and she hates me.
Although her nipples would tend to disagree.
It’s a deadly combination.
She’s a princess.
And when I say princess, I mean intolerable, spoiled brat with a tiara.
Sure she’s got that curvaceous goddess thing going on,
but that mouth of hers…
God it needs something in it to shut it up.
#GotJustTheThingRightHere

This is not your average British romance.
It’s a tale of high heels, hot tattooed bad boys and
sex oranges, all wrapped up in a coating of chocolate.
It’s ‘love’ in a social media world,
where not everyone is who they seem
and where some people’s bios should carry a warning.
#JustSayin

goodreads button

Amazon-Buy-Button

Excerpt

The sight and smell that greets me is just the same as it was yesterday. Bowls and utensils everywhere; and an incredible smell of chocolate and trays with neat lines of rolled truffles. Except today, I notice it. How did I miss all this crap yesterday, chocolate usually comes above everything!

Oh, but yesterday I was on a mission.

Drooling, I head around the counter and pick up a ball of chocolate from one of the trays, savouring it as the flavours explode in my mouth. Dark chocolate with some kind of boozy fruit flavour. God, it’s good.

And she did this?

She’s dangerous.

A woman who looks like her, thinks like her, wears those shoes, gives me shit and makes stuff like this, is a danger.

If I had a heart, I’d be falling in love.

I come to a big bowl of soft looking chocolate goo with a spatula sitting in it. I dip my finger in the gooey goodness and lift it to my mouth.

Holy hell! That is fucking amazing. It’s ginger and dark chocolate with some alcohol. Damn. I want to put my face in the bowl. I glance around, then shrug. Lifting the spatula out, with a decent scoop, I lean against the counter and take a good long lick.

“What the hell do you think you’re doing?” she barks as she comes into the kitchen.

“Just having a taste, Princess,” I reply, turning to let her see me take another lick.

She storms over, trying to grab the spatula out of my hand. Good luck with that sweetheart, this is me and chocolate. You ain’t getting it back.

“You can’t just wander in here whenever you feel like it.”

“The door was open.”

“Give that back!” she demands, catching hold of it. For a second we both pull at it, but then I see an opportunity and let go. Chocolate splatters her face, neck and chest and stops her dead in her tracks.

I choke on a laugh.

She looks at me, mouth open, “You did that on purpose!”

I shrug.

She glances down at the mess on her chest and my eyes follow, locking in on her begging nipples, visible through her dress. She looks embarrassed.

“It’s ok, Princess, I know they like me even if you don’t. Happens whenever I’m around.”

“It does not!”

“Mmmm-ok.”

I step closer. She backs off, but I catch her arm and pull her close.

“What are you doing?” she gasps.

“I don’t waste chocolate,” I reply softly and then lean in and swipe my tongue over her temple.

She wriggles, but it’s a weak effort. “Get off me,” she demands.

“Hold still, Princess, it’s all over you.” I take another lick at her cheek and move down to her neck.

“Ok, that’s enough,” she snaps, her breath catching in her throat as I suck in her earlobe.

I lick her neck just below her ear even though there’s no chocolate there and the way her head falls slightly back in surrender makes me swallow hard. “It’s never enough,” I murmur.

What the fuck?

I shake the sappy shit out of my head before I grow a vagina, and pluck the spatula out of her hand, painting a trail down her cleavage. Dropping the spatula on the floor, I grab her by the arse and lift her so that I can lick it all off. She yelps and struggles and I plonk her down on the kitchen counter, leaning forward and feasting on the stripe I painted between her breasts. Her dress is ruined, shame, I quite liked it.

Paula's Review

Twitter. Oh how I hate to love you. The competition amongst female followers over a “hot” guy, the attention seeking, the jealousy, the private chats, the things you do when you get sucked into the Twitter vacuum. This book was so relatable and spot on. I grinned throughout all of it. ‪#‎SeenIt‬

Jazz was incredible. I absolutely adored her. She’s in a job she’s good at but not completely happy with. When she discovers the hot guy she’s been lusting after from afar is on Twitter, she does what anyone would do, she starts stalking his tweets. ‪#‎YouKnowYouWould‬

I was completely absorbed by her honesty about the things she did to interact with Spencer on Twitter. All of the things she did to get his attention without being obvious made me laugh. As did the way she became obsessed with what he was tweeting and didn’t want to be. Let’s be honest, I think most of us have done that a time or two. ‪#‎NoShame‬

Spencer is a guy who has let the allure of social media attention go to his head a little bit. ‪#‎ALot‬ Although I didn’t completely fall for Spencer, I sure did enjoy seeing him fall for Jazz. ‪#‎Fucker‬ It was nice to see someone have to work for it.

The back and forth between Spencer and Jazz was hilarious. I loved Jazz’s turmoil over trying to reconcile the real Spencer vs the fantasy of Twitter Spencer. Kerry Heavens did a superb job of capturing the realization that the fantasy we create in our mind of people in this social media world is not always what they really are. We see what we want to see, until we really see it. ‪#‎GettinDeepThere‬ When the two worlds collide for Jazz and Spencer, the push/pull between them had me grinning like a fool.

This book was funny but it was also hot. That includes the cyber sex and the real sex. ‪#‎SignsUpForCyberLessons‬ There was one sex scene in this book that I’ve never read about before. And wow. Kudos to Kerry Heavens for not being afraid to include some squirting. Also, anyone that knows me, knows I love a good stroking scene. It’s always been my favorite thing. This book had it. ‪#‎ThankYou‬

Kerry Heavens has a fantastic sense of humor. I loved all the UKisms. Arse. What a great word. Mags, Jazz’s best friend, is my favorite supporting character I’ve read in quite awhile. She’s exactly the type of best friend I would want. It’s rare when the supporting characters are on par with the main characters for me, but Mags was. ‪#‎NeedABookAboutHer‬

I did lose some steam in the last 20% of the book and never fully connected with Spencer like I did Jazz. Even so, it was still a really good book and made me a big fan of Kerry Heaven’s writing. If you are in the mood for a fun, sexy read then you need to give this a go. It’s well worth it. ‪#‎BuyIt‬

4 Stars

Ang's Review

Spencer by Kerry Heavens has it all: crisp witty writing, lovable characters, heat, angst, cyber sex, hate sex, hot-grinding-can’t-get-enough-I-need-alone-time-right-now-sex, girl code, chocolate, designer shoes, and a good ‘ole fashioned psycho Cinderella. This book made me so happy. I may have even fist pumped when I finished.

Where to start? I have to mention the Twitter angle in this book. It was spot on and represented that crazy Twitter beast perfectly. I laughed so hard reading about Spencer’s tweets of flirtation and all the ladies that swarm to him. It’s like a pack of wolves circling their prey and fighting to the death to get that special attention. I’ve seen that play out on Twitter so many times. Hell, I’ve even participated in it, but I know it’s all a ruse.

When we first meet Spencer, I’ll admit I was a little nervous. I thought, “Is he going to be one of these douchey alpha males?” Nope. Not at all! The author did a wonderful job of separating Spencer from that sort right from the beginning. He may be ridiculously hot and post shirtless selfies on Twitter, but he’s much more than a pretty face and deep down he’s a good guy. I think I loved him when he thought this about the Twitter madness:

“All I ever see is competition, bitchiness and that special thing girls do to each other, faking friendship with a smile, while slowly inserting the knives in each other’s backs. . . . I will never understand women. They would be simply unstoppable if they stopped screwing each other over.”

Preach it, Spencer. A shirtless, tattooed, philosopher? Can I keep him, please? I loved his tattoos, his cockiness, his brains, his dominant side, his teasing side, his front side, and his backside. You get the gist.

The thing that’s super refreshing is that Spencer could back up all of that bravado he put on Twitter. I’ve come across some interesting characters in this social media world, and it’s still a shock when seemingly normal people turn out to be nutters with multiple fake personas. I’ve never seen anything quite like this, and the author does a terrific job of laying it out in all of its freaky glory. But lucky for us, Spencer’s not some crazy lying troll that’s never gotten laid. He’s got the goods to back it up.

So who is the woman that wins Spencer’s heart? My girl, Jazz, is the perfect match for Spencer. She’s tough but sweet, hard yet soft. She’s a designer shoe and chocolate aficionado, a confident, curvy, sexy, talented woman. Plus she’s a real girl’s girl and is loyal to her bff, Mags. I love love loved that when there was even a hint of the two women possibly being interested in the same man that Jazz backed off with no questions asked. This. This is what girl code is about. The author paints this picture of best friends with typical ups and downs but underlying it all is a deep and abiding love and friendship. I adored these two together. Jazz has a successful career but she’s dealing with a pervy boss and has been putting off her dream job while she goes the corporate route. In the midst of sorting her career situation, which takes an unexpected turn, she gets entangled in this fascinating Twitter situation with Spencer. What happens when you meet your fantasy in real life? Is it love at first sight? Don’t bet on it. Watch my girl play the player.

Can we talk about the sex again? I’ll be honest; I never understood the appeal of cyber sex until now. Holy shit! These scenes are on fire, but I’d still prefer to hear about it in the flesh. Thankfully, these two get to meet in person and when they do … Good god. The sex in this book was over the top, delicious, smoldering; give me more, gushing, and I mean gushing, left-hand worthy sex. When he told her to take her clothes off? … I felt it all the way down there. This is how I want my sex scenes, you guys.

Apart from all the Twitter goodness and hot fucking, this book has real meat to it. There’s a great back-story for the characters and we get to see what makes them tick and watch their character growth. There are outrageous things that will shock you but it’s all part of the wild ride. Your heart will break a little but then it will burst right open. The pacing and plot kept me interested throughout. This book is jumping to the top of my favorites’ list. Sometimes a book just hits you in a certain way and Spencer did that for me.

It would be remiss not to mention the Britishisms. I need to start reading more British authors because these arseholes and cheeky bitches rock my world. I want to visit the English countryside and run into Will or Spencer in a café.

Kerry Heavens, you are my new hero! I can’t wait to read more books from you, most especially Mags and Will’s story. I need to see what these two delightfully wonderful people are up to.

Go one-click this bad boy now! I hope you’ll love Spencer and Jazz as much as I do.

5 Stars

Candi's Review

Stroking, spanking, squirting OH MY!! This book, is pure brilliance. Kerry Heavens wrote a story unlike anything I’ve ever read. The whole twatter angle and how things can really be on social media. Yeah. She nailed it. Bulls eye!!

I can’t say enough on how much I loved these characters! Jazz is just amaze BALLS!! She’s feisty, a smart ass, mouthy, take no shit, sexy creature. And Spencer, holy Jesus. He is this uber sexy, cocky arrogant ass. But it suits him. And makes you crave him. Yes. Weird, I know. But just trust me. You’ll want to slap him a few times. But you will love him!!!

These two first meet by accident in a super market. Jazz swoons in the sandwich section. This happens a couple times. Jazz’s best friend, Mags, who I absolutely LOVE, finds the mystery man on twatter. And this is where the fun begins. I literally had so many déjà vu moments during all the twatter action. Not the cybering stuff. I have never done that!!!! But the convos that happen on twatter. Between best friends. I loved it!! So, they track down Spencer, and get him to engage in a conversation. They twatt, they flirt, and then…dun dun dun. They enter the danger/fun zone of direct message. And good lord. And good god. The cybering had me wanting to set up an account for my husband to have some fun!!

During this time they are both dealing with work stuff. Which lands them both moving and living in the same village. It’s kinda hard to review this without giving things away. So I will just say this. YOU MUST READ IT!!

It’s brilliant. It’s witty. It’s hysterical. It’s sexy. It’s off the charts HOT!! I’ve read hundreds of books. And I have never read one quite like this. Kerry Heavens is a GENIUS!! Her writing is so fresh and so different!! And I have a feeling that everyone is going to be talking about this book!! Whatever you do today, make sure you 1-click this!!!

5 Stars

About the Author

Terrible wife

Mediocre mother

Appalling housewife

Fashion graduate

Wedding co-ordinator

Sex toy salesperson

Shop manager

Designer

Font collector

Romance addict

Fancier of nice men

Ok, fancier of almost all men

Awesome cupcake baker

Incessant singer

Film buff

Friend

Writer

Facebook | Twitter | Website

gossip girls