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Hey guys,

I wanted to share a little bit of myself with you. I have this relatively new obsession with m/m romance books and gay porn. You may be asking yourself, why is a lesbian obsessed with m/m romance and gay porn? Well, that’s a great question! In fact, I’ve asked myself this question many times. For the life of me, I can’t really explain it. I can tell you that I’ve always enjoyed seeing two men together whether it’s on TV, in the movies, walking down the street holding hands, or dancing in a club. I used to love to watch the TV show Queer as Folk and the sweet movie Latter Days is still one of my favorites. I especially loved when my gay friends told me their sex stories. When I was in my twenties, I was so intrigued with these stories and the idea of men having a magic p-spot to rival our g-spot, that I tried to get my straight boyfriends to engage in a little experimentation to test this theory. Let’s just say some were more inclined than others. I digress. You guys. I digress a lot so bear with me, please. Where was I?

Let’s see. This all comes back to me stating the obvious. I’ve been reading m/f romance books since I was a tween, and I usually love them. I mean that’s why we are here, right? Our great love of romance books. Well, I kind of got into a massive slump after I read Night Owl by M. Pierce last October. I had a horrible book hangover and pretty much hated every book I read or picked up afterwards. I couldn’t get into anything. *cue epic side rant* All of a sudden the heroines were too whiny, too annoying, and too goddamn insecure. Who makes up these rules? Is there some sort of publishing rule that women won’t relate to a heroine unless she doubts her self worth? Fuck that. I want to read about strong, sexy, independent, confident women. They can be troubled, a little fucked up, and have doubts. We all do. But I don’t want to read a whole book with self-doubt as the main character. *end side rant* Anyway, I was in this slump and visited one of my favorite book blogs hoping to find something to cure me. I discovered Marsye had a favorite m/m book list. Say what? It was like a little light bulb went off! This. This is what I needed. I could get behind these books! Why not? I already knew I was a big fan of TV shows and movies featuring gay men. This was just the thing I needed to kick me out of my book slump. I knew I was ripe for jumping full feet ahead into this genre, but I didn’t realize there was a whole community out there and that all of these books were just one-click away. My foray into m/m reads started with Try by Ella Frank followed with Collide by Riley Hart. These are both GFY (gay for you) stories, and I adored them. Perhaps because I have my own gay for you story. I used to date men exclusively before I met my wife, and I could relate to the characters’ emotional roller coaster and journey. So then I started devouring m/m books like it was my job. It was such a refreshing change from the “oh my god, why does he love little ‘ole me? I am so NOT special. I’m so average and this beautiful rich powerful man likes me!” It was something to switch up the Fifty Shades of Grey storyline that was being regurgitated in all the books I was reading. Not to say I don’t enjoy those books. I do, but I was bored. The m/m books were new and exciting to me. I actually haven’t read a m/m book that I do not like. It seems like I discover a new favorite with each new read. I’ve been really lucky because the m/m books helped get me out of my slump and now I switch it up between the genres. But I can’t go too long without a m/m read.

Now you know how my love of reading m/m books came about. So now comes the porn part. One night on twitter, I was discussing favorite m/m books with a friend. She asked me if I had heard of Colby Keller and Dale Cooper. I told her no. *gasp* She sent me a glorious masterpiece of a video link with about 10 videos featuring Colby and Dale together and separately. You guys. It was full on gay porn. Suddenly, I had at my fingertips a supply of beautiful, hot, and sexy as fuck gay porn. To be clear, I was never really into porn before this fixation started. I mean, of course, I’ve watched it. You know how in the beginning of a relationship you are always willing to try anything once? That always seemed to include the requisite porn viewing. It was fun, kind of interesting, and sometimes a turn on but often times ridiculously over the top. All this to say, I never really got off to porn before. I’ve always preferred to use my own memories and fantasies to set the mood, but I won’t lie as there are certain books that really really inspire left hand action. Check out my favorite’s list. Ahem. But now I had this little library of Dale and Colby porn to add to my book collection. And guess what? It is most definitely a turn on. And how. The best part is that my fellow Dirty Girls and numerous other book friends agree. I feel like there is this movement of straight and lesbian women that are obsessed with m/m romance and gay porn. Even after all this talking, I still can’t explain it. Do you guys have any theories? Maybe it’s seeing the physical act of the orgasm. With men, there is no questioning whether they got off or if they are faking. The “money shot” is pretty on point.

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Another thought … since I’m such a romantic … (all this talk of porn and getting off really screams to my romantic side, right?) I was fascinated by this rumor that Colby and Dale dated in real life but were no longer a couple. Then I was so curious as to why they broke up when they were so hot together and had such great chemistry. But there’s more to life than great sex, right? I believe so, but I also think that added to the appeal of the videos for me. This idea that there was a real life connection behind the emotions they conveyed … it seemed so real and raw and made the videos even more exciting. Since I had this star-crossed lovers theory going on in my head, I suspect that helped spark my interest as well.

So. There you have it. This is the start of my little obsession with Colby, Dale, and m/m romance books. You guys will be hearing all about it. Stay tuned because I’ll be back to tell you about that time I, holy shit, met Colby Keller in person.

xo
Ang

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Known image credits: “A Thing of Beauty Part 1” by Cocky Boys